Monday, November 30, 2009

Bandera 100k

Ok so this race is looming... there are just 40 days until the race. I have to sign up for the race by Dec 12th or I have to pay extra. So I have just 12 days to decide whether running 62miles is going to be a good idea.

Saturday I ran with my running group and got to meet the new person, who has actually been running with the group for about 2 months now, and it went alright. I finished the 10 miles and felt pretty good afterward although my speed seems to have left me. I do have 40 days so I think I can do some work by then.

This is crazy!!

Friday, November 27, 2009


Ok, so I bet every blog in the world has been updated with something the writer is thankful for, but before I get started. I'll tell you about my week.

I sold the truck, it is done money deposited, truck keys handed over. I just hope the guy enjoys the truck as much as we did and that it doesn't break down or something terrible like that. However, with my luck you never know. During the completion of the sale of the truck I gave him the wrong title!! Apparently I placed the wrong title in the truck file in my filing cabinet. So he calls me and of course he lives in Burnet, which isn't close. Ugh!! plus to make it worse, according to the back of my title for the Impala he owns it! So on Monday I have to figure out how to fix that problem. Sunday or Monday I'm gonna try and meet the guy to give him the correct title.

My in-laws have let us borrow their truck, and now they are offering to give us a car free. And actually give it to us to the point where we can sell it and keep the proceeds. This is attractive because we could save up the 5k we got for the truck, plus the proceeds from the sale of the Rav-4 to pay for a potentially much newer car than what we originally intended to buy. I can't see why there is any reason to say, "no" other than my thoughts that I don't want them to think we're taking advantage of them if we decide to do something other than buy a much newer car. Plus today when I was chatting with my wife, the thought crossed my mind that it could be a way I come up with 10k to start the design process for my business plans. I don't know what to do!!!

BUT here's what I'm thankful for, and I hate sappiness so understand I'm not joking or trying to be sappy.

1. I am forgiven in Christ Jesus, and I can pray and ask for guidance and that I know no matter my decision, he's got a plan for me to be used by him in the spread of his gospel.
2. My wife. She is so patient and loves me unconditionally. I always envy how quickly my dogs will be scolded by me but yet desire my love, but I envy D'Lane's quick forgiveness. I feel inadequate when compared to her.
3. My daughter. She is more than I could have ever wanted. I told God I was pleased with his provision whatever it might turn out but now that she is here, I could have never asked for what he gave me.
4. My family. They are amazing and supportive. They care about me and my wife and our baby. What more could I ask for from them, yet they are willing to give me what they have up to all they can.

Not sappy... I'm not capable, because I like to pretend I am a robot.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009


Well the truck is gone... now we have to find another vehicle. I'm not so worried about that because it happens to be a holiday week and so I have some time to look around. Plus my in-laws are letting us borrow their truck in the meantime. I am really apreciative of that because it doesn't make this something we have to rush on AND I don't have to ride my bike every day to work.

Tuesday, November 24, 2009


This blog was supposed to be about training for a 100k run, BUT I haven't really been training well. However, last night I did get on my new trainer.

I didn't really want to workout but I don't have much time before the 100k and I'm gaining weight. SO I told myself, "the baby should be waking up soon, I'll ride until then." Only problem is the baby didn't wake up for another hour and 20 minutes. She was pretty tired apparently.

I only rode for 30minutes because I'm outta shape and the dogs started licking the sweat drops off the floor, but it was a good workout. Much better than the stationary bike at the gym and I burned 421kcals in 30 minutes with an average heart rate of 133bpm and a max of 164bpm. That put me in my fat burning zone for 11 mins and I managed to burn 50% of those calories as fat. So good workout, my legs had that great I've just rode my bike hard feeling.

The unknown

Well as tough and heartless as I appear to be sometimes, or as I like to say confident. I have to admit, I'm kind of anxious, hesitant, and maybe just scared about some decisions we have made and are going to make.

1. We sold our truck! This is a good thing on paper, it has 156k miles on it and nothing has gone wrong on it. Which means something is right around the corner. Plus it only gets about 18-20mph and when gas returns to its $3-4 range we'll appreciate having sold it more. We sold it for $5300, that I'm a little disappointed in. Kelly Blue Book was way off in their valuation of the truck, but I couldn't really get any interest in it beyond that price. But here's what I'm kind of anxious about, change! I know the truck, inside out, I've worked on it and we've owned since day one. The next car, will be used and I'll have another learning curve.

2. We need to buy a replacement car! Now I have to get one that makes sense. Something with lower miles than the truck, one that gets 25mph-30mph, one without any major problems. You know how some cars are just known for their problems. Our Impala is known to eat coolant and ours is no exception. We've also got to get a good deal on it, or at least something under 6k which is what we saved up for plus the sell of the truck and taxes, registration.

Those two things alone are enough to make my mind a constant whirl of thoughts and emotions. It is tough to know if you're doing the right thing or not. I've prayed about it and feel good about the process but you just never know what the future holds until you're there.

3. The business! Man, just getting the designs for a business is crazy expensive! I am looking at the very real possibility of needing to spend 8-10k on this business just to see if it can be done! I always joke about wishing I had a trust fund, but seriously I am wishing I had a trust fund now. Talking with a friend Greg, I got an idea of what I'd need for the development of the land and structure about 6k, then talking with a design company for the business another 2-3k. It is that moment where you look up at a mountain and then to either side of it and try and figure out which way makes more sense or if you should turn around altogether. I don't want to lose, I don't want to make the wrong choice. I believe in the idea, but maybe not enough to put my money, fear and pride aside to continue.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Saturday's 10k

Wow! I'm really outta shape... where it effects me the most is mental toughness. I virtually have none. I know I can run 6.2 miles... I did it at the half-marathon just a week ago.

So I set out to once again try and hang with my more consistent friend for as long as I could in the race. I managed a little over half-way and then decided to take a break. At that point in time I waited for my wife who was walking with our baby and told her she could run while I walked with the baby. Our jogging stroller was given to us but our baby is still way to small for us to really use it for running so one of us needs to walk.

She ran until we were on the same lap and then we walk/ran the last lap together. It was what I wanted and it made the race enjoyable.

It really fired me up about getting a jog stroller that we could use now. So I bought one on Sunday. A Bob, I had been looking at other strollers but secretly wanted a Bob. I just wasn't willing to pay over $200. It was like a mental block for me. BUT on Saturday after the race I found one on craigslist (my favorite website) and scheduled to look at it on Sunday. My wife had seen in the Baby Bargain book that fixed wheel Bobs were the intersection point on quality, functionality and price so that helped sway me to buy it. I wanted a Revolution, because they look cooler, but they were soooo expensive, even used ones, and we already have a stroller for non exercise applications, which helped me realize I just want something I can take the baby jogging in without worrying if her neck got broken or if she fell forward and her face is rubbing the front tire.

So I managed to pay $190 and can't wait for my wife or myself to use it. Hopefully together!!

Friday, November 20, 2009

Business Idea

My wife had a business idea... it was a good idea, I've talked about the idea. It is a great idea...
Another idea my wife had was a Chick-Fil-A, I tried that one. Chick-Fil-A turned me down I thought because I wasn't an current or former employee but I found out that someone is already opening a Chick-Fil-A in our area. They will do very well.

BUT starting a business, "the right way," with all the documents and research and spreadsheets and organization and forms is just about as much as my ADD brain can withstand. Plus given the amount of money I'm wanting to work with it creates much doubt in my mind. When I don't have doubt, I have at least enough work to do to dissolve my focus.

I know I'm not the first person to say this, but "If I only had a million dollars!"

Right now I'm working on the business plan, most of it is boring work. I'd rather be writting an english paper in some college class. I'm getting concerned that I will not be able to get a loan for the business and all this work will have been a lot of lost lunch time training sessions. But it is a great idea, and I'm tired of just talking about great ideas.

Bike Trainer

ok so I've been looking for an indoor bike trainer for a long time...

I'm cheap and couldn't bear the thought of spending $300 for something new when I could probably find it on Craigslist for much less. While I was starting to doubt that after month of searching, I finally found a trainer I wanted on CL!!!! AND the person selling it was someone I knew! So finally last night I used it... the trainer has several resistance levels and a remote shifter so I don't have to get off my bike to change the setting.

What I learned? Indoor riding wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. It actually was more fun than the stationary bikes at the gym. I need a fan that can blow in my face because I was sweating like a pig and last but most important. I've lost a lot of my fitness since the baby was born.

I'm getting a plan and hopefully we'll by a jogging stroller that we can use with the baby and we'll be able to start running some more. I would like that, my wife would like that and I know our dogs would LOVE that.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

An Idea

OK so I've been working hard on an idea my wife had and said weeks ago in passing. The more I thought about the more it seemed like more than just an idea. It was a great idea. So I started asking people what they thought about how to go about accomplishing this because we'd have to borrow money. AND since we hate borrowing money because we've gone through and been very successful with Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace program, the thought requires that I be very confident that I'm making the right decision, but also that I'm borrowing the smallest amount of money I can. I'm being careful, and cautious, deliberate and thoughtful in my plans.

I'm excited, the time is now. I'm not going to let this idea go, unless I've exhausted all the options. It is a great idea, it is something I've wanted to do.


Now when we found out we were going to have the baby, people began to tell us how our life would change. When they would tell me how it would change, it was basically that all my hobbies would go out the door. I knew that they had some truth there, because everyone was telling me the same thing. But in my mind I thought, "it doesn't have to be that way!" What I didn't count on was that I would WANT to miss workouts because I wanted to spend time with the baby OR because I WANTED to give my wife some time away from the house.

As a result, I've neglected swimming and cycling and running and any other physical activity for that matter. The only bad thing is we had signed up for a half-marathon before the baby. Having not trained for this race, and relying solely on my base from the half-ironman training I did in the spring, I did it. My poor wife and to just rely on good ole' fashion blood, sweat and tears.

Before the race I started thinking it was a bad idea, at mile 1 I thought, "this was a dumb idea" and then mile 2 I thought, "am I going to make it?" And it kept getting worse until mile 4 when I decided to run to the 10k mark and walk to let my wife catch me and we could finish together.

She never caught me and I walked to the end. We finished the Rock-n-Roll Half Marathon, it wasn't pretty but it helped kick-start the desire to train hard so I can be fast. Now to figure out how to make that happen.

Monday, November 9, 2009


In an effort to make this a more interesting blog, instead of a boring running fanatic blog I'll try and be a little more transparent about other places that I am involved in.

I like the title of my blog, and I feel it represents me well, because I think I can do anything. It is confidence, in myself, my family, and the things God has given me. Most people interpret this as arrogance, but its not. Arrogance is where you think you can do things better than everyone else. It is an attitude of superiority. Sometimes I'll admit, I border on the arrogant side. It usually stems from having thought of and experimented solutions to a process many many times.

The problem I run into is, I hate to fail. I hate to fail publicly even more. I especially hate to fail when it involves money. And here lies today's topic, risk! I'm not a big risk taker. I don't think I've ever really been a risk taker. Now that I have a wife and daughter I'm really not a big risk taker. It has to seem like a pretty sure thing for me to invest anything into an idea that has risk. I won't even invest time, if I'm not sure about things.

The good news, I have never lost lots of money or been publicly humiliated or failed on a large scale. The bad news is I feel like I have a lot of trapped potential and sometimes holding it in is more difficult than dealing with the failure. It causes me to hate things, my commute, my house, my job, my hobbies and their expenses, and it effects my relationship with God. I hate the way I've been created. And because everyone around me does not think like me, it is difficult to find someone that can relate, advise and help me reconcile my heart and my mind. I don't have the answer, and I feel like I'm failing.